DIVORCE UPDATE

Thanks everyone for your continued support on this very painful and frustrating issue.

Today I am having to work on some divorce matters and I thought it was about time I brought you up to date. Many of you have emailed me asking what is going on with the divorce, when will it finally be over, is he being agreeable, etc. I have hesitated on posting anything lately to avoid the "not so sweet" emails afterwards from my soon to be ex. (He says the blog should be called "bashvicupdate.com" which many of my friends said they would love to put together!!! Boy would that be an interesting website!!!)

Unfortunately he doesn't understand the impact of his actions on Maxwell and how relevant it is to our daily life. The more stress he brings to my life and the more financial struggle we endure, the less I can fully give to Maxwell emotionally, physically and financially. And I don't want anything to impact him negatively and I will fight tooth and nail to get what we deserve so that Max has the very best chances for a good and happy life.

Anyway, all I care about at this point is getting a fair distribution of our assets and equal financial support since I cannot work due to Max's health and development. Fortunately he is paying what the court is ordering him to pay at this point (not a fair division but at least it is something), but there is much more to be discussed. He has no concept of what is needed in Max's life, but hopefully he will see the light someday. I keep encouraging him to get involved and learn more about CHARGE, his care, etc. but recently I have begun to give up that effort because it was proving to be fruitless.

What is frustrating in the divorce is that I built my businesses (we own 8 Curves together back in WV/PA) and now he is getting 50/50 of them. In WV law, it supposedly doesn't matter if someone caused the divorce (adultery, etc.), it still is 50/50 distribution. Then he bought five additional businesses while Max was in the hospital undergoing numerous surgeries. Unbelievable, right? I know. So while I will be staying at home with Max for years to come (and living on limited alimony/child support), my soon to be ex will be advancing his career, building business equity and increasing his wealth. Understand the frustration?

I would LOVE to be working...I absolutely loved my career and miss it tremendously! But I know that Max's health and development is the #1 priority...I wish others felt the same!

So I guess the next step is our "status conference" in a few weeks and then hopefully the final hearing will be in April. I was hoping to settle out of court. Unfortunately we have been unable to come to a resolution, which means I have to travel back to WV for the hearing leaving Maxwell behind (he is not stable enough to travel). I am not happy about that at all. I have no idea how I am going to do that...or how he will be cared for...most likely we will have to hire nurses to be with him 24/7.

It is ridiculous how long this has been going on. I was so hoping we could come to an agreement so this could be over once and for all and I wouldn't have to leave Maxwell for even a minute. My heart just breaks thinking about it!

I decided during this time to also change legal representation and am feeling very hopeful about their abilities, but of course that has required extra time and money to catch them up to speed.

It is so absolutely frustrating it is to be dealing with all of that while trying to celebrate Max's progress in so many areas these past few weeks. But I guess we gotta do what we gotta do!!!

Anyway I best run to work a little more on these divorce issues...and then when Max wakes back up, we need to make our nearly daily run to the drug store for prescriptions! And then back home for lots of therapy and hopefully baby food tasting!